A Reason, A Season, and A Lifetime

So long ago that I can’t remember where it came from, someone once said to me:

“Andrew, people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.”

It stuck. Not because it was poetic (though it is), but because when I parsed it against the filter of my lived experience, I saw the truth it stated.

Reason Some people arrive with a very specific purpose.

They help you buy your first home or they give you a shot at your first management role. Sometimes they sit with you while you’re trying to work out what on earth you’re meant to do next. They might teach you a specific skill, open a door, or say one sentence that changes how you see yourself.

That’s not small work. That’s a reason. And once that reason has been fulfilled, they may drift out of your life. Not with drama. Not with blame. Just… naturally. Their work is done.

Season They’re the friends from the preschool years, when your diary is dictated by nap times and birthday parties, or the parents you rotate through soccer weekends with. They might be the colleagues you survive the early-career trenches with as an SDR, a grad, or an acquisition seller learning on the job.

These relationships are real. They matter. They often carry laughter, stress, inside jokes, shared fatigue, and shared pride. But seasons change.

Your kids grow up, you change jobs, move city, our lives reconfigure. And suddenly, without anyone doing anything wrong, you’re no longer in the same place. The friendship doesn’t end in conflict, it just no longer has the same soil to grow in.

And then, if you’re lucky, there are the lifetime people. You don’t always know who they are straight away. They might be someone you met in high school. Or in your first corporate role. Or when you moved to a new city or country and knew absolutely no one.

What makes them different isn’t frequency or proximity, it’s this: No matter how much time passes, you pick up where you left off. Call them? They pick up, they call you? Likewise

They don’t belong to a chapter of your life. They belong to you.

I offer this framework, reason, season, lifetime, as a simple lens to use when relationships shift. Instead of asking, “What went wrong?” I ask, “What was this relationship here to give or teach?”

So if you find yourself grieving a friendship that’s faded, or feeling confused about why someone isn’t in your life anymore

You might gently ask yourself:

• Was this a reason?

• Was this a season?

• And who, if anyone, has shown up as a lifetime?

Because some were meant to walk us home. Others were meant to walk us part of the way.