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Writer's pictureAndrew J Calvert

One Simple Trick to Building Instant Connection (Hint: It's Their Name)

I walked into the restaurant on a drizzly afternoon and explained that we couldn’t book a table online. I asked if they could reserve a table for six two days from now. Without any fuss, the hostess said she’d check. After a quick glance at the booking system, she smiled and said, “I’ve done a manual override and got you a table for six at 12:30 on the 29th.”


As I thanked her, I asked her name.

Two days later, we walked past a long line of people waiting to get in. The restaurant was packed—except for one empty table, waiting just for us. Grateful for our foresight, we took our seats.


About five minutes later, the same hostess appeared at our table. "Hi, Georgia!" I said. She looked a little surprised (maybe even suspicious), so I smiled and added, “You helped us book this table a couple of days ago. I asked for your name.”


Her face lit up with recognition. She asked if we needed anything and then went on her way. But for the rest of the meal, she kept checking in on us. Sure, she attended to other tables, but ours? We definitely got the VIP treatment.


Another time, Tanya introduced herself at breakfast. During some small talk, she mentioned she had just returned from visiting her son in the country for her birthday. Two days later, we greeted her by name when she approached our table again. She was speechless—and from that moment on, she gave us extra attention, making sure everything was perfect.


These are just two examples of how much of a difference it makes when you remember someone’s name. Not only does it make them feel seen, but it also enhances your own experience.


So, how do you use someone’s name?

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